One Week Later.....

Day 7

When I first started using blogger, I though I was wasting my time by writing here. When I began to write (during the first couple of days) I didn't take it as seriously as I should have but as time progressed I started to get more comfortable with writing here. First it felt like a chore, but as time progressed I must say I really started to enjoy it.

 In my last couple of blogs, in which I started to open up a bit more, I talked about some things I have had to deal with in my life: differences in my family and the loss of my uncle. Writing these felt really good, as I let go of some things that were bothering me for a long time. I wish I would've known from the beginning how enjoyable blogging actually is. For me particularly, as you've known with my previous blogs, I'm not one to express a lot. I am happy person but even the happiest still have their struggles and for me I've had my share. The good thing about getting knocked down, is getting back up and I always, no matter how difficult it may seem, try to do this. Looking back at my life there is nothing I'm ashamed of, well that a lie but I try very hard not to think about the past but to focus on the present because dwelling in the past can't help you fix your future.

 I kinda went a little off topic there but as I was saying this blogging experience has really helped me reflect on some hardships I've had before in my life and I really want to thank my teacher for giving us this assignment. Although I know she didn't quite enjoy reading my blogs as much as I did writing them, I believe I learned a lot about myself and grew as a person in the process. I hope I can continue talking about this in future blogs, but for now this isn't a good-bye but a see you later.

Coping with a Loss

Day 6

For me expressing my feelings isn't very easy. Even here on this blog I just feel like sometimes I have avoided talking about subjects that truly matter to me. Sometimes its even hard for me to talk about what I feel with my own family and I just avoid the topic. I am generally happy person and I always try to not let things or others bother me, I just let it slide. My father always says don't give things that don't have importance,too much importance and that's exactly what I do. But sometimes you just can't do that there some things that just hit you and bring you down from this sort of "cloud" of happiness you have created for yourself. One of these things for me was losing my uncle. A couple of years ago my uncle passed away and at first it didn't hit me as much but then I realized how much I really missed him. 

My uncle was a very-hardworking and successful man. I always looked up to him because he achieved a lot of great things. He had this great charm and ability to tell the funniest jokes I have ever heard. He was a always fun person to be around and I always had a great time being around him. His biggest flaw was his extreme devotion to his work. He was a workaholic and sometimes seemed to prioritize his job too much. When he realized it, it was already too late as his condition only got worse. I just wish I would have been able to tell him this before. I am not sure he knew how much I really cared for him and how great I though he was. What makes it even worse is, I don't get to be around my cousin as much as I used to before. You see, my family and his mother's never really got along that well and since his death, I haven't been around my cousin as much. This really bums me as he has always been like a brother to me and we get along really well. Now I only see him every couple of months but I try to call him at least once a week to see how he's doing. 

Not even my mother knows I cared this much for my uncle because I'm not much of a sentimental guy but sometimes we talk about him once in a while. I am working on getting better with expressing my thoughts and feelings but for now I am glad I got this out in the open.

My Family and their Differences

Day 4

Ever since my parents divorced when I was very little, there has always been this sort of grudge match between them. They always seem to try to outdo one another and sometimes I just wonder why can't they just get along? I know they have their differences but why can't they just set them aside and move on. I know that sounds easier than it seems but its not impossible. The thing is it isn't just my parents, sometimes even my grandparents swoop in to say a thing or two. What really bothers me are the indirect comments that come out of nowhere, its like one minute we're talking sports and the next about something completely different. 

Its not like I don't love my parents, of course I do. I am extremely fortunate to have parents that are always there for me and like to spend time with me. They both basically hang out with me like they were my friends, we do a lot of things and spend a lot of quality time together, which I love but I just wish they would get along better. As its usual with divorced parents each have their take on why they split up (those of which I really don't care about) and again similar to the comments that pop up out of nowhere they each tell me their side of the story. "It was your mother's fault" or "It was your father's fault". 

The thing is as you must know divorced parents have to see each other quite a lot, as they attend to everything we participate in from sports to graduation. Today, however I have kinda grown used to this, so I don't mind for it too much and it has improved as my parents have learned to (for my sake) tolerate each other a little.

Aspirations for the Future

Day 3

The future... The so-distant yet so-near future.. We people seem to have everything planned: what we're going to study, where we are going to work, when we will have a family, etc. However, as it turns out almost nothing goes according to plan. Still, we need to have these aspirations because they are what give us hope, inspire and motivate us moving forward.  We need something to look forward to, and that something is our future. For me, my aspiration is to become a lawyer. Since being affiliated with justice runs in the family, ever since I was very little I have been always been fascinated with being a lawyer. There's just something about defending the rights of the people and doing them justice that I just seemed to admire and have done ever since. However, I am open to many career opportunities, which means I'm still unsure whether or not I'll go through the "path of justice", so to speak.

Anyhow, I'm focused on the here and the now. What exactly will my future be I guess I'll just have to wait to find out, but for all I know it's better to live in the present than regretting what you could have done with your past in the future.